Sunday, April 13, 2025

Don't Make a Scene: Tombstone

The Story: Latin at five paces.
 
So, we lost Val Kilmer. But, he'll always be around because his movies will be around, and in some cases they'll be evergreen because his performance in them made them such.
 
Like Tombstone, one of the "Wyatt Earp" movies that came out around the first half of the 1990's (studios have projects in stasis and when they hear another studio might make a similar movie, they dust off their old script and try to beat the rival to the box-office). Tombstone was first out of the gate and did very well, despite a troubled production—screenwriter Kevin Jarre was directing, but his pace wasn't considered practical and so he was replaced with the very quick (but sometimes at a cost) George P. Cosmatos.
 
Even if the product looked a little "jinky" at times—sometimes people aren't looking at the folks they're talking to, and it even happens in this scene—you had to admire the script (although it did adhere to the old "O.K. Corral" mythology) and Val Kilmer's eccentric performance as "Doc" Holliday.
 
It changes over the course of the movie, it starts being still and measured, but as the movie rolls on, a little more of Kilmer's wicked Marlon Brando-imitation—they worked together, unhappily, on The Island of Dr. Moreau—starts creeping in, and for some reason, it just works and works well. In fact, despite a great performance by Kurt Russell in the lead, Kilmer seemed to walk away with the movie.
 
He could be absolutely amazing, and it's sorry to see him go.
 
The Set-up: Wyatt (Kurt Russell), Virgil (Sam Elliott) and Morgan Earp (Bill Paxton) have settled down in Tombstone, Arizona where they set up stakes in a gambling salon, but Wyatt is informed by his friend "Doc" Holliday (Val Kilmer) that Tombstone is beset by the Cowboy gang led by "Curly Bill" Brocius (Powers Boothe) and including members of the Clanton family as well as Johnny Ringo (Michael Biehn). Their paths were bound to cross.
 
Action.
 
Doc chuckles. Suddenly Curly Bill looms over the faro table with Ringo and a drunken Ike Clanton. 
CURLY BILL
Wyatt Earp, huh? 
CURLY BILL
I heard of you.
IKE
Listen, Mr. Kansas Law-dog. 
IKE
Law Don’t go...
IKE
...around her. 
IKE
Savvy? 
WYATT
I’m retired. 
CURLY BILL
Good. 
CURLY BILL
That’s real good. 
IKE
Yeah, that’s good, Mr. Law-dog, ‘cause law don’t go around here. 
WYATT
(interrupting)Yeah, I heard you the first time.
WYATT
Winner to the King 
WYATT
five hundred dollars.
CURLY BILL
Shut up, Ike.
RINGO
(steps up to Doc) And you must be Doc Holliday. 
DOC
(coughs then casually) That’s the rumor. 
RINGO
You retired, too? 
DOC
Not me. I’m in my prime. 
RINGO
Yeah, you look it. 
DOC
And you must be Ringo. 
DOC
Look, Darling, Johnny Ringo. 
DOC
The Deadliest pistoleer...
DOC
...since Wild Bill, they say. 
DOC
What do you Think, darling? Should I hate him? 
KATE
You don’t even know him. 
DOC
Yes, that's true...
DOC
but (I don't know)...
DOC
there’s just something About him. 
DOC
Something around The eyes, 
DOC
I don’t know, 
DOC
reminds me Of… 
DOC
...me. 
DOC
No. I’m sure of it, 
DOC
I Hate him. 
WYATT
(to Ringo) He’s drunk. 
DOC
In vino veritas. (
Truth in wine)
RINGO
Age quod agis. (
Do what you do)
DOC
Credat...
DOC
..Judaeus Apella, non ego. (Let Apella the Jew believe it, but not I*.)
RINGO
(pats gun) Ecentus stultorum...
RINGO
...magister. (A brilliant teacher of fools)
DOC
(Cheshire cat smile) In pace requiescat. (
May he rest in peace)
WHITE
(enters, appeasing) Come on now. 
WHITE
We don’t want any Trouble in here. Not in any language. 
DOC
That's...
DOC
...Latin, darling. Evidently...
DOC
...
Mr. Ringo’s an educated Man. 
DOC
Now I really hate him. 
Ringo looks at Doc, holding his gaze while suddenly whipping out his .45. 
Everyone but Doc flinches.
CURLY BILL
Watch it, Johnny...
CURLY BILL
I hear he's real fast.
Ringo does a dazzling series of twirls and tricks, 
his nickel-plated pistol flashing like a blaze of silver fire, 
finally slapping it back into his holster with a flourish. 
Cheers and hoots. 
Doc rolls his eyes, 
hooks a finger through the handle of his silver cup, 
then launches into an exact duplication of Ringo’s routine using a cup instead of a gun. 
The room bursts into laughter. 
Doc shrugs. 
Ringo lets a strange little hint of a smile cross his face 
then exits with the others. 
 
 
Words by Kevin Jarre
 
 
Tombstone is available on DVD, Blu-Ray and 4K/UHD from Sony Pictures Home Entertainment

* A.I.'s good for something:  "The phrase "Apella the Jew believes not me" is a Latin saying, "credat Judaeus Apella, non ego," that translates to "Let Apella the Jew believe it, but not I." It's used to express skepticism or to dismiss something as absurd or unbelievable, according to Wiktionary. The phrase suggests that even someone considered easily believable, like "Apella the Jew," wouldn't believe the claim, implying it's ridiculous.

The expression, first used by Horace in his Satires, has become a common way to express disbelief, according to Jewish Encyclopedia.
It's also seen in the movie Tombstone, where it's used by Doc Holiday in a Latin scene, according to a Reddit thread.

In essence, "Apella the Jew believes not me" is a rhetorical device that asserts a statement's lack of credibility by suggesting even the most gullible person would not believe it.
"

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